“Surrender is really a beautiful thing needed for reality to manifest itself”.
“Openness is really true surrender.”
A. H. Almaas cuts to the core of surrender, bringing the depth of decades of understanding to the conversation of surrender. He takes us on an exploration of the real essence of what surrender truly is, the often overlooked and missed meaning. He helps us to identify the ego and he helps us to navigate the complexity of ego on the spiritual path. Listen and accelerate your spiritual growth, compress decades into days as he shares a deeper understanding of the nature of who we are beyond the ego to find our purpose for life.
In This Session with A.H. Almaas, You Will Learn:
The real meaning of inner surrender
How to transcend your ego
How to deal with the resistance of surrender
The stages to surrender
How to know when to commit and persevere and when to let go
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Susanne
14 hour ago
I am truly interested in the topic of surrender, especially since my husband is an x-Marine with a military mindset which is not in alignment with the understanding of Spiritual surrender. So I was hopeful this Surrender Summit would open his mind to the true meaning of the Victory of Surrender! However, we are both have physical hearing challenges. So listening to your sessions is more effort than we can enjoyably give. CAPTIONS would help a lot!
Isabelle
1 hour ago
Yeah surrender. I practiced surrender to the world of lies’ as my dear teacher Hameed Ali (A.H.Almaas) is calling the usual plane of ego, for half a century. I don’t agree anymore with my own tendency to surrender. I am asked by Hameed’s collegues to go play outside and surrender to the so called ‘power’ of the egoic universe, which is also called ‘fake power’ in our DA Work. No place in the inn of the Ridwhan School ‘in my case’ I was told by the authorities. I was forced to think about my others. to inquire into all kinds of psychological phenomena.
Well, yes, ok. I’ll play outside, here I am, I do feel in touch within myself. As loving as possible. Willing to give in where possible. But if ego rules the show, if people just wanna be ‘happy’ like your lovable friend Mike wants to be happy, what’s that about in a spiritual school like Hameed’s Ridhwan School? What’s the difference then with the conventional life where suffering is the norm in actuality, besides the desire for feel good. A desire for love can’t simply be equated to love itself?
And it’s not just ego what we can observe in people around, also sparks of Beingness can be distilled as Hameed said, which is more Real. My observation too! People manifest both ego and Realness, useful to distinguish I would say. Like your friend Mike seems to be a very nice sucker. I love his Sincere love for his 8 year old daughter and his Passionate love for his partner. So those features -Passion and Sincerity- are examples of Essential qualities that we speak a lot about in our Diamond Approach Work.
In the past I didn’t even distinguish between ego (narcissism, you know: me and ‘our’ interests at the instinctual plane that’s most normal) ‘at one hand’ and then Being Real ‘at the other hand’ (like Compassion, Truth and Happiness). It didn’t make sense to me to somehow seperate ego and Beingness at the soulplane. We’re more whole I would say? As embodied Beings. But thanks to my beloved teacher Hameed Ali I learned about the possibility to Discriminate: Critical Awareness can be applied in our daily lives for example, or Objectivity or Intelligence.
I can’t afford to just surrender to whatever anymore. It would mean giving up on life and giving up on people. I would give in to my tendency to withdraw and conclude that there isn’t any other option indeed then to stay still and hide forever indeed, too hopeless, life isn’t possible in my case. I could as well vegetate a bit for the rest of my life, just here now, as loving as possible, but no place at the inn for me. I’m seen as someone who does not belong. As it is. I would give in to feeling terrified for people meanwhile. Ego runs the show, that’s how it is. They just talk about Beingness, sounds nice. Not the reality. In reality my Strength or my Beingness otherwise needs to be ignored at all costs. In my experience with the Ridhwan School at least. Not much of a problem in my work teaching groups. I do adapt and surrender a lot normally.
I just surrendered for the first half a century of my life, I surrendered to my environment most of the time, I was quite invisible, no problems that way, I did my thing, I developed myself, Went to university, I studied the conventional world, I became a martial arts practitioner for a few decades, Buddhist mediation to support my Tai Chi practice. So yes, that was about ‘wu wei’, surrender, staying still and giving in a lot. Besides my boxing practice as well. And I’m grateful to those teachers who told me to not always give in!
And for example it can be needed at occasion, hands up, don’t kill me please, maybe even smile to that white male bastard in a uniform. Our other, our authority can be dangerous at times, in a situation when we ourselves are declared ‘too other’ while fake power is involved. Make him feel he’s a human being too.
Yes, good idea. I tried to mirror Essential soul features that I witnessed as well in the difficult situation I found myself in. But sometimes ego simply rules the show. I am meeting closed doors, just a wall: either you or me/we is the message. Isn’t negociable. I should not be an individual? I should not exist? Why? Am I forced to give up on my very existence or my right to speak up?
Some psychological insights are indispensable on the way to ‘self realisation’, on our way of becoming a more mature Spiritual human being. How is our past involved? Projection. You look like my mother and I don’t like my mother and so on. Or this eternal ‘either me or mommy’ – toddler stuff. (which is called ‘the approachment conflict by Hameed.)
Isabelle
1 hour ago
And then I became a student of Hameed. I joined a group in the school for 5 years. Inquiry. YES! Hameed’s life work?! YES! I was deeply impressed when I met Hameed in 2007 during his booktalk in Amsterdam about Brilliancy. YES! I found my teacher! YES! YES! YES! I didn’t intend to give up ever. I found my teacher, I found my path, the Diamond Approach. YES!
Nevertheless I was kicked out of the Ridhwan school for unclarified reasons. By one of the DA teachers. The main teacher of the group. The senior teacher. After abuse of a particular kind has taken place for 5 years. Didn’t work out to her taste I guess? Should be denied. Issues should not exist. And then all her collegues and even the deeply appreciated co founder of the school who is her longtime collegue and maybe a psersonal friend, agreed with the teacher who was in charge of the group I was in. Fake power was ok apparently.
Walking the talk wasn’t important apparently? The teacher in charge regretted that I saw myself as Hameed’s student. She must have been right to block me on my Spiritual path in the eyes of her collegues without any further questions? Her path, not my path? Our path. My existence should be wiped indeed. An explanation wasn’t even needed. Would be easiest I guess. Would be easiest for everybody else if I should be a nobody, if I would be so kind to simpy disappear and ‘surrender’? While in our school we are asked to speak our truth, to tell our story, to make our suffering explicit is what’s encouraged in this school. But if I do so, as objective as possible, while avoiding emotional drama as loving as possible, and I really forgive. Yes, I’m a someone, a somebody. I’m told that I am not allowed to ‘belong’.
The official policy in the Ridhwan school is often: ‘all are welcome’. And once you’re accepted as a Diamond Approach Student you are accepted as such, that’s what you are, a DA student. Long story short: The senior teacher (I adored her a bit), was busy with all kinds of manipulations, all kinds of projections onto me were involved: I was a child, I was supposed to go play outside, I was the underlying ground, she was exhilarated about my so called ‘no Being’, sometimes called my simplicity of Being by the teacher in charge, which was fantastic in her eyes and also very useful? For her herself. She has been aiming for something. She was more important then me, either she or me to my naive amazement, her ego was placed above me in the assumed hierarchy; my existence was supposed to be utterly unimportant, besides useful for my other, the particular teacher in charge? And the teacher considered herself to be just a bit ‘mischievious’ with all kinds of so called ‘alchemical’ manipulations, wanting something from me, I should agree with her point of view. All of that wasn’t exactly aligned with Hameed’s work in my own view. See: https://youtu.be/Widq9JGmUW0 Jessica Britt on Trauma and Out-of-Body Experience
The manipulations of Jessica Britt, the DA teacher of the group I have been in, have been quite extreme. She wanted to become a very important pearl or however, strange nonsense. meanwhile our work in the Ridhwan school is about doing our own work of inquiry? Our proces of clarification. So her manipulations were not the usual DA work.
In our school, the DA Work is to tell our story, to speak up about what happened, to make explicit, what is going on now, how do we feel now, how is the past involved, what’s still undigested, that stuff comes up even if the theme is ‘love’ for example. Inevitably so, that stuff wants to be seen, needs to be seen. ‘Just now’ is nonsense normally. Would be just the usual emptiness that we often observe both in the world and for example in a Buddhist monastery? We might aim to transcend the issues, but.. is it for real? Don’t we have our work to do still normally? Our here and now does have a context and a history. As I learned from Hameed.
Surrender? Yes, sometimes or often. But we do have to deal with our context as well sometimes I would say. How has the unbearable past of the DA teacher been acted out, abuse is also what happened to me? A rehearsal of abuse. what happened has appeared to me as a rehearsal of the past in many ways. Needs to be faced sometimes. Here and now I’m confronted with the past of my teacher and how that abusive past of hers has had consequences for me. So my situation here and now is impacted by my environment, besides the consequences of my own past that are involved as well. A rehearsal of abandonment.
So I do not agree with Hameed if he is telling us: just here now. The environment is part of my ‘here’, and the past of myself and others is normally having a lot of impact as well as far as undigested stuff is involved, which is often the case. Which is part of our work of inquiry normally. Clearing work.
In our Diamond Approach Work it’s not just about Love always. would be fake pretense in my eyes. Also difficulties at the psychological plane can arise, which then can be inquired into. Which is called ‘the Point’ – Work, by Hameed. He has written a book about ‘the point of existence’ (which is about transforming narcissism of all kinds into Bliss and Light and Honey and Love eventually).
So yes, good question, Kute: what is the point, what is the meaning of life? Is it just about acting out our instinctual desires? I want, I need? Just like that? I wanna feel good? Not about real relating? Issues are not appreciated that much normally I guess. Narcissism is implied as far as we have to deal with issues? As I said: issues aren’t valued a lot normally. Whatever should stay hidden. Too uncomfortable. Taboos. We wanna be Happy at the usual plane. At whatever cost normally? (Mike was Nuanced in that sense. My Appreciation.)
Feeling good is rather about the Essential qualities that my dear teacher Hameed talks about a lot as well. Love, Discriminating Awareness yes.
And a contrast between Essence and ego can be distinguished. So Essence in all kinds of forms, like ‘Will’ of ‘Steadfastness’ can be distinquished from ego (me and my interests, so you don’t count and so on). While ego often appears as ‘I and my WE’. (As a kind of majestatic plural so to speak)
Just here and now is what Hameed suggests? WE are all one, right. And the individual should not exist? Or does not exist? Or does not exist anymore apparently in Hameed’s experience? Why not? I consider myself to be an autonomous individual, embodied at my own location. And I do not wanna choose either autonomy (withdrawn as an isolated individual since I am supposed to not belong and I should surrender) or relating and Being part of the school as the unique person that I simply am. I prefer both, both my individuality and relating in a more real way.
I think Hameed’s particular alchemical project is to clarify how we’re all different as unique individuals, with different backgrounds, our past included yes. Unique as soul Beings. And our backgrounds imply those memories, with a lot of consequences in our here now normally.
It wouldn’t make sense to see each other as ‘just good or just bad’? In reality we’re not either narcissists or ‘good people? Meanwhile someone could be declared to be too ‘other’ for whatever reasons, and it doesn’t even have to make sense normally. Which is what happened to me. My existence didn’t count. I was ‘the other’ and an object of blame. Hameed has explained a lot over the last centuries (over the last 45 years) about psychological issues that normally arise between people in terms of (either) self or other. (the toddler stuff: not you mommy, mother as other, you are naughty, mommy! and then later on someone else is declared other). The either me or you stuff that is acted out all over the place. Not that mature yet normally?
If I’m seen as other, as the bad other even, should I surrender? Even if it would cost me my very life? If I am supposed to lose my beloved teacher Hameed and my place in the precious Ridwhan School. ‘should’ I indeed give up on my spiritual path and on so called selfrealisation by giving in? Would it be best to surrender to fake power and an authoritarian approach -apologize my straightforwardness please after struggling with it all for nearly 10 years now. That’s quite something. I really should? Meanwhile superego stuff, the psychological stuff in terms of being told or telling ourselves how we’d better give up and surrender indeed is also part of the curriculum in our SPIRITUAL School. Not something to act out in a blind way. Silence, a silence treatment, is even recognized in the Diamond Approach school. Acted out nevertheless. No dialogue about it, why not?
Being an individual is already enough to be declared the much needed ‘object of blame’ as I learned from dear Hameed. Yeah. In Hameed’s precious school, the Ridhwan School, I was told: I/we not you, stranger! And you see, I could be declared an object of blame by the ‘WE are all one’ -people, since I should not be an individual. Could be message from my others ‘out there’, the ‘we and our collegue’ – people so to speak. My so called others, since I’m not supposed to say ‘we’ myself. We and our particular interests are the priority seems to be the message. I should surrender indeed? And I have to admit: it’s hopeless to a degree that I didn’t expect. I’m naive.
I’m simply declared not ok in a vague way, doesn’t even have to make sense. Content is ignored totally as it seems to be. Projections are going on all over the place anyways. People told me: ‘you look like my father’ several times. (I’m innocent, I’m not their father, not even male, my blue eyes should be proof of my innocence, I’m supposed to be at the safe side that way?) You know, fake power might be what’s in charge in actuality? While in the spiritual school Hameed’s deeply appreciated teachings are about the potentialities of applying Essential qualities. Wonderful! YES! Yes, let’s get human now. Love now. YES!
Isabelle
1 hour ago
And by the way TIME might be involved. Instead of just here now. I mean, I had to deal with the issue of Being manipulated away by a Diamond Approach Teacher. Ego was involved. I was confronted with an inability to be objective all over the place as it appeared to me. (I tried my best in that sense of objectivity.) So my existence was just wiped. No access to the school anymore. I was not responded to in a real way. I was supposed to be a nobody, or what? Nobody does stand up for me? I should surrender. Yeah. No access to my precious beloved teacher Hameed anymore, ‘in my case’. I should disappear in the void and not be a bother. I was considered such a naughty child. I should learn to obey at last? No inquiry, no investigation, has taken place whatsoever according to all kinds of bullshit that has been going on as far as I know. No response by ethical committee nor responded to by the ‘care committee’. Just surrender? Just carry my fate? I’m declared an object of blame by the authorities of this precious school? I should tolerate and accept whatever? I don’t agree.
The perspective of the DA teachers might be that a very important seniour teacher. our collegue, told us that you should leave, for whatever reasons, so she must be right? And indifference otherwise? How it appears to be for me. Many tears have been shed. A traumatic past of the senior teacher was involved in my eyes. Sometimes that kind of stuff is acted out inevitably. Has been sheer ignorance and denial. Has been too impossible. So that past has been acted out at my cost and at the cost of fellow students as well. My Understanding, my Forgiveness. (yes somebody here to say in my case: I forgive, a lot of understanding meanwhile).
Psychological stuff is usually involved, also in a Spiritual school. Projections, superego claims, I should, you should and so on. I studied the whole context. I also tried to stand up for myself. Which has been in vain. Despite my Strength. I was not listened to. Maybe because of my Strength and Steadfastness? The doors stay closed! I should obey, I should surrender, I should not be listened to. The President of the school himself told me that he would send his lawyers. I said: yes, ok, let’s go to court, see what happens. Prevented by Hameed probably.
My reasonable request was: listen to me please. I need to be rehabilitated. Can we please apply those beautiful Essential qualities that Hameed has been talking about all along? Like Surrender (needed sometimes, not always, not hands up in every situation right. Like: the superiority of white people or male people is a given. Can you please accept your status as Being less then whatever whiteskinny person that’s supposed to know better in advance. Despite your objective intelligence, university grades, life experience and so on and so forth. While in a dangerous situation, where no dialogue is possible, better learn to give in for a little while. Hands up yes. To save our very lives. But.. just surrender?! Really? Let’s hide? Let’s give in to abuse? Are you kidding?)
How about applying the Love and the Steadfast Will or Awareness and Presence. has been my reasonable request to the folks of the Ridhwan school. I asked for applying this precious tool of inquiry. I asked for Being rehabilitated, since an authoritarian approach does not seem to be aligned with Hameed’s lifelong work as I made explicit. Why would a superego approach be seen as a ‘stronger approach’ then the Diamond Approach? I have been wondering. Why the silence treatment? I have been mainly confronted with silence. Being excluded. Should we surrender to narcissism and all kinds of blame? Being seen as not important whatsoever? Just surrender to the ego of our so called others, since I myself have been declared ‘other’? I should surrender and be just loving. Yeah.
Yes, I surrrended within. Yes, trying to beat ego of my fellow beings is an impossible job. Ok, I’ll give in. I’ll give up. I’m gone in a way. Killed in a way. I’m still alive as well. And I’ll continue to show up and ask for some reasonability. How else. So I don’t agree with Hameed’s message here now: just surrender always is the most advanced or best in any case, even if it would be at the cost of my own wish to become friends again, my whish to clear the space, to face the issue, to talk a bit, to be reasonable and to apply the beautiful Essential qualities like Love and Surrender. Hameed himself is ignored all this time is how I feel about what is going on? Hameed’s teachings just considered something to throw away? I – do – not – agree!!!! His Work is so precious to me. My deep respect!!
My tough love I guess? My love for myself is implied. Wouldn’t be reasonable if Hameed himself (I’m joking, he’s God in my eyes, I like the colour of his shirt, meaningful in my eyes,) would ask me to not exist. But if he himself would ask me to give in to the authorities if they claim to know better, if He Himself would tell me that I should indeed surrender to being declared of no importance whatsoever, since my life doesn’t count indeed? I would be forced to disappear in the void I guess? Would be easiest for whom?
You know, I have always surrendered to my others who pretended to know better, I shrugged my shoulders most of the time and I continued to learn from them even, my others wanting to be most important and so on. Can lead to abuse to just surrender as I know by experience. Can lead to abuse to just surrender externally I mean, I do surrender within meanwhile. This hopeless? I didn’t know that! I’m terrified at a deep plane, I have to admit. Really? Either ego or Being Real? Can’t be true. In Hameed’s school?! So now I know. And yes here and now. And we also have to face what needs to be faced sometimes?
As an embodied human being, as an individual in my own right, having learned so much from dear Hameed my precious teacher during those 5 years when I was ‘allowed’ to be a student in the school, and also the during the 10 years (!) that I kept showing up with my own particular truth, how I wanted to be part in the school, my proposals to face the situation: my conclusion is that saying ‘no’ sometimes to my others, to the authorities even, is needed sometimes. It’s a YES to myself in actuality.
Isabelle
1 hour ago
So I don’t agree with Hameed if he would say: Surrender is best. I don’t even understand the distinction between inner and outer I have to admit. But now I know, as reasonable as possible, I continue to say yes to myself, which does imply a ‘no’ to my others out there sometimes. I don’t wanna tell them they’re just narcissistic, just bad, just their ego, those others, my authorities. It’s not that now ‘they’ have become the ‘object of blame’ for me. In reality people are sometimes ‘good’ sometimes ‘bad’ if you like, dependent on the perspective, but I do not surrender to Being declared an object of blame by authorities that are telling me: our WE, not you, stranger! So I do not always surrender in every situation is my point.
Has been meaningful to learn this little piece of wisdom. I learned a lot while I kept standing up for myself. Has been very very difficult for sure. But surrender to what isn’t most Real would have simply killed me! I did learn to give up to the world of ego totally, I learned to detach totally in a sense. Meanwhile I do not assume that my fellow Beings are just their defense, or that defense needs to be seen as identity. I assume it’s all just an attempt to avoid painful experiences. And that attempt needs to be at my cost or at the cost of whoever as an ‘object of blame’. Needs to be faced in my view. But I cannot change my others of course. And if going along with whatever and surrender always is what Hameed prefers, I do not agree.
So thanks Hameed, for everything, but if you would tell me: go play outside, it’s about me and my school, you do not count..If you would tell me that my soul being doesn’t count, not of much value indeed, if you would tell me that you don’t give a fuck about my deep engagement with your life work for such a long time. If you would tell me: it’s just about them, it is how it is, ego runs the show, that’s my reality, and all others are my WE, while you do not belong apparently and it does not have to become clear indeed why you need to be abandonded by US, since all kinds of interests are involved indeed. Which should stay hidden indeed. People do not want to talk. They prefer silence. So did you become Buddhist now, Hameed, I would ask. Just the silence? On our way to Light.
Well in that case, I would be forced to leave you, dear Hameed. Since I do not buy Being treated in such a way by you and your collegues if I’m simply sincere myself. I don’t think that’s your intention by the way if you tell me: play outside, or give up on the world of denial and lies out there otherwise, either -or, but don’t you dare to be who you are. YES, dear Hameed, I love you. I am deeply committed to your lifework. So Yes, I do surrender internally to what’s most true. and I’m willing to deal with the situation myself at the best of my capacity. Which is what I have done till now.
I do need support though, I do need to be rehabilitated, and if that’s not what you choose to do yourself, rehabilitating me in my dire situation, if you just tell me to please surrender to the situation of power abuse and spiritual abuse, I would give up. I don’t believe you though. I think you are reasonable and loving and supportive. Not easy for you either to deal with it all! With love and understanding, here and now. Isabelle
JoAnne
23 hour ago
Putin bashing invalidates this conversation. Surely a surrendered ego would be aware of the pitfalls of misinformation, disinformation, etc, and avoid political judgements that are premature or or potentially misguided.
Karen
20 hour ago
He is able to talk about such profound stuff in a totally unpretentious and relaxed way. Bravo, thank you !
Thank you for the kind words, Karen! We are happy you are here and are able to feel the amazing energy and love through the wisdom of our speakers in the Surrender Summit. Love.Now
Wafa Elamrani
2 hour ago
That was very profound and so inspiring. Thank you Kute and Hameed for sharing this holy moment, God Bless you.
With peace and respect
Wafa
Thank you, Wafa, and thank YOURSELF for receiving the gift and wisdom of surrender. Keep watching for more practical how-to’s for living surrender. Love.Now
Tui
12 hour ago
The BE-ing I get. It’s the No-Thing that is still beyond! 😀
Eli Bernstein
13 hour ago
Supremely grateful that A.H. Almaas was able to share his wisdom in this Surrender Summit. That heartfull moment towards the end touched me deeply, when surrender was perceived as “an openness to experiencing reality beyond my current understanding”…just beautiful. Thank you.
Thank you for your thoughtful words, Eli! We are happy you are here to receive the wisdom of such visionaries like A.H. Almaas. Stay tuned for more this week! Love.Now
Tui
18 hour ago
Holy WOW- I can get aspects of what he is saying, like wisps I can sort of see but not quite hold! But this is BEYOND!
Yes, Tui! Surrendering to your own divinity is a process and once you put into practice all the wisdom that is being shared this week, you will surely be able to grasp the true meaning of being. Love.Now
Lani
21 hour ago
When facing something that I cannot do, my ego says I can, but deep inside I have knowledge that I am weak. So I let it go and surrender and feel the mighty power of the divine to take over lead me to do what needs to be done.
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I am truly interested in the topic of surrender, especially since my husband is an x-Marine with a military mindset which is not in alignment with the understanding of Spiritual surrender. So I was hopeful this Surrender Summit would open his mind to the true meaning of the Victory of Surrender! However, we are both have physical hearing challenges. So listening to your sessions is more effort than we can enjoyably give. CAPTIONS would help a lot!
Yeah surrender. I practiced surrender to the world of lies’ as my dear teacher Hameed Ali (A.H.Almaas) is calling the usual plane of ego, for half a century. I don’t agree anymore with my own tendency to surrender. I am asked by Hameed’s collegues to go play outside and surrender to the so called ‘power’ of the egoic universe, which is also called ‘fake power’ in our DA Work. No place in the inn of the Ridwhan School ‘in my case’ I was told by the authorities. I was forced to think about my others. to inquire into all kinds of psychological phenomena.
Well, yes, ok. I’ll play outside, here I am, I do feel in touch within myself. As loving as possible. Willing to give in where possible. But if ego rules the show, if people just wanna be ‘happy’ like your lovable friend Mike wants to be happy, what’s that about in a spiritual school like Hameed’s Ridhwan School? What’s the difference then with the conventional life where suffering is the norm in actuality, besides the desire for feel good. A desire for love can’t simply be equated to love itself?
And it’s not just ego what we can observe in people around, also sparks of Beingness can be distilled as Hameed said, which is more Real. My observation too! People manifest both ego and Realness, useful to distinguish I would say. Like your friend Mike seems to be a very nice sucker. I love his Sincere love for his 8 year old daughter and his Passionate love for his partner. So those features -Passion and Sincerity- are examples of Essential qualities that we speak a lot about in our Diamond Approach Work.
In the past I didn’t even distinguish between ego (narcissism, you know: me and ‘our’ interests at the instinctual plane that’s most normal) ‘at one hand’ and then Being Real ‘at the other hand’ (like Compassion, Truth and Happiness). It didn’t make sense to me to somehow seperate ego and Beingness at the soulplane. We’re more whole I would say? As embodied Beings. But thanks to my beloved teacher Hameed Ali I learned about the possibility to Discriminate: Critical Awareness can be applied in our daily lives for example, or Objectivity or Intelligence.
I can’t afford to just surrender to whatever anymore. It would mean giving up on life and giving up on people. I would give in to my tendency to withdraw and conclude that there isn’t any other option indeed then to stay still and hide forever indeed, too hopeless, life isn’t possible in my case. I could as well vegetate a bit for the rest of my life, just here now, as loving as possible, but no place at the inn for me. I’m seen as someone who does not belong. As it is. I would give in to feeling terrified for people meanwhile. Ego runs the show, that’s how it is. They just talk about Beingness, sounds nice. Not the reality. In reality my Strength or my Beingness otherwise needs to be ignored at all costs. In my experience with the Ridhwan School at least. Not much of a problem in my work teaching groups. I do adapt and surrender a lot normally.
I just surrendered for the first half a century of my life, I surrendered to my environment most of the time, I was quite invisible, no problems that way, I did my thing, I developed myself, Went to university, I studied the conventional world, I became a martial arts practitioner for a few decades, Buddhist mediation to support my Tai Chi practice. So yes, that was about ‘wu wei’, surrender, staying still and giving in a lot. Besides my boxing practice as well. And I’m grateful to those teachers who told me to not always give in!
And for example it can be needed at occasion, hands up, don’t kill me please, maybe even smile to that white male bastard in a uniform. Our other, our authority can be dangerous at times, in a situation when we ourselves are declared ‘too other’ while fake power is involved. Make him feel he’s a human being too.
Yes, good idea. I tried to mirror Essential soul features that I witnessed as well in the difficult situation I found myself in. But sometimes ego simply rules the show. I am meeting closed doors, just a wall: either you or me/we is the message. Isn’t negociable. I should not be an individual? I should not exist? Why? Am I forced to give up on my very existence or my right to speak up?
Some psychological insights are indispensable on the way to ‘self realisation’, on our way of becoming a more mature Spiritual human being. How is our past involved? Projection. You look like my mother and I don’t like my mother and so on. Or this eternal ‘either me or mommy’ – toddler stuff. (which is called ‘the approachment conflict by Hameed.)
And then I became a student of Hameed. I joined a group in the school for 5 years. Inquiry. YES! Hameed’s life work?! YES! I was deeply impressed when I met Hameed in 2007 during his booktalk in Amsterdam about Brilliancy. YES! I found my teacher! YES! YES! YES! I didn’t intend to give up ever. I found my teacher, I found my path, the Diamond Approach. YES!
Nevertheless I was kicked out of the Ridhwan school for unclarified reasons. By one of the DA teachers. The main teacher of the group. The senior teacher. After abuse of a particular kind has taken place for 5 years. Didn’t work out to her taste I guess? Should be denied. Issues should not exist. And then all her collegues and even the deeply appreciated co founder of the school who is her longtime collegue and maybe a psersonal friend, agreed with the teacher who was in charge of the group I was in. Fake power was ok apparently.
Walking the talk wasn’t important apparently? The teacher in charge regretted that I saw myself as Hameed’s student. She must have been right to block me on my Spiritual path in the eyes of her collegues without any further questions? Her path, not my path? Our path. My existence should be wiped indeed. An explanation wasn’t even needed. Would be easiest I guess. Would be easiest for everybody else if I should be a nobody, if I would be so kind to simpy disappear and ‘surrender’? While in our school we are asked to speak our truth, to tell our story, to make our suffering explicit is what’s encouraged in this school. But if I do so, as objective as possible, while avoiding emotional drama as loving as possible, and I really forgive. Yes, I’m a someone, a somebody. I’m told that I am not allowed to ‘belong’.
The official policy in the Ridhwan school is often: ‘all are welcome’. And once you’re accepted as a Diamond Approach Student you are accepted as such, that’s what you are, a DA student. Long story short: The senior teacher (I adored her a bit), was busy with all kinds of manipulations, all kinds of projections onto me were involved: I was a child, I was supposed to go play outside, I was the underlying ground, she was exhilarated about my so called ‘no Being’, sometimes called my simplicity of Being by the teacher in charge, which was fantastic in her eyes and also very useful? For her herself. She has been aiming for something. She was more important then me, either she or me to my naive amazement, her ego was placed above me in the assumed hierarchy; my existence was supposed to be utterly unimportant, besides useful for my other, the particular teacher in charge? And the teacher considered herself to be just a bit ‘mischievious’ with all kinds of so called ‘alchemical’ manipulations, wanting something from me, I should agree with her point of view. All of that wasn’t exactly aligned with Hameed’s work in my own view. See: https://youtu.be/Widq9JGmUW0 Jessica Britt on Trauma and Out-of-Body Experience
The manipulations of Jessica Britt, the DA teacher of the group I have been in, have been quite extreme. She wanted to become a very important pearl or however, strange nonsense. meanwhile our work in the Ridhwan school is about doing our own work of inquiry? Our proces of clarification. So her manipulations were not the usual DA work.
In our school, the DA Work is to tell our story, to speak up about what happened, to make explicit, what is going on now, how do we feel now, how is the past involved, what’s still undigested, that stuff comes up even if the theme is ‘love’ for example. Inevitably so, that stuff wants to be seen, needs to be seen. ‘Just now’ is nonsense normally. Would be just the usual emptiness that we often observe both in the world and for example in a Buddhist monastery? We might aim to transcend the issues, but.. is it for real? Don’t we have our work to do still normally? Our here and now does have a context and a history. As I learned from Hameed.
Surrender? Yes, sometimes or often. But we do have to deal with our context as well sometimes I would say. How has the unbearable past of the DA teacher been acted out, abuse is also what happened to me? A rehearsal of abuse. what happened has appeared to me as a rehearsal of the past in many ways. Needs to be faced sometimes. Here and now I’m confronted with the past of my teacher and how that abusive past of hers has had consequences for me. So my situation here and now is impacted by my environment, besides the consequences of my own past that are involved as well. A rehearsal of abandonment.
So I do not agree with Hameed if he is telling us: just here now. The environment is part of my ‘here’, and the past of myself and others is normally having a lot of impact as well as far as undigested stuff is involved, which is often the case. Which is part of our work of inquiry normally. Clearing work.
In our Diamond Approach Work it’s not just about Love always. would be fake pretense in my eyes. Also difficulties at the psychological plane can arise, which then can be inquired into. Which is called ‘the Point’ – Work, by Hameed. He has written a book about ‘the point of existence’ (which is about transforming narcissism of all kinds into Bliss and Light and Honey and Love eventually).
So yes, good question, Kute: what is the point, what is the meaning of life? Is it just about acting out our instinctual desires? I want, I need? Just like that? I wanna feel good? Not about real relating? Issues are not appreciated that much normally I guess. Narcissism is implied as far as we have to deal with issues? As I said: issues aren’t valued a lot normally. Whatever should stay hidden. Too uncomfortable. Taboos. We wanna be Happy at the usual plane. At whatever cost normally? (Mike was Nuanced in that sense. My Appreciation.)
Feeling good is rather about the Essential qualities that my dear teacher Hameed talks about a lot as well. Love, Discriminating Awareness yes.
And a contrast between Essence and ego can be distinguished. So Essence in all kinds of forms, like ‘Will’ of ‘Steadfastness’ can be distinquished from ego (me and my interests, so you don’t count and so on). While ego often appears as ‘I and my WE’. (As a kind of majestatic plural so to speak)
Just here and now is what Hameed suggests? WE are all one, right. And the individual should not exist? Or does not exist? Or does not exist anymore apparently in Hameed’s experience? Why not? I consider myself to be an autonomous individual, embodied at my own location. And I do not wanna choose either autonomy (withdrawn as an isolated individual since I am supposed to not belong and I should surrender) or relating and Being part of the school as the unique person that I simply am. I prefer both, both my individuality and relating in a more real way.
I think Hameed’s particular alchemical project is to clarify how we’re all different as unique individuals, with different backgrounds, our past included yes. Unique as soul Beings. And our backgrounds imply those memories, with a lot of consequences in our here now normally.
It wouldn’t make sense to see each other as ‘just good or just bad’? In reality we’re not either narcissists or ‘good people? Meanwhile someone could be declared to be too ‘other’ for whatever reasons, and it doesn’t even have to make sense normally. Which is what happened to me. My existence didn’t count. I was ‘the other’ and an object of blame. Hameed has explained a lot over the last centuries (over the last 45 years) about psychological issues that normally arise between people in terms of (either) self or other. (the toddler stuff: not you mommy, mother as other, you are naughty, mommy! and then later on someone else is declared other). The either me or you stuff that is acted out all over the place. Not that mature yet normally?
If I’m seen as other, as the bad other even, should I surrender? Even if it would cost me my very life? If I am supposed to lose my beloved teacher Hameed and my place in the precious Ridwhan School. ‘should’ I indeed give up on my spiritual path and on so called selfrealisation by giving in? Would it be best to surrender to fake power and an authoritarian approach -apologize my straightforwardness please after struggling with it all for nearly 10 years now. That’s quite something. I really should? Meanwhile superego stuff, the psychological stuff in terms of being told or telling ourselves how we’d better give up and surrender indeed is also part of the curriculum in our SPIRITUAL School. Not something to act out in a blind way. Silence, a silence treatment, is even recognized in the Diamond Approach school. Acted out nevertheless. No dialogue about it, why not?
Being an individual is already enough to be declared the much needed ‘object of blame’ as I learned from dear Hameed. Yeah. In Hameed’s precious school, the Ridhwan School, I was told: I/we not you, stranger! And you see, I could be declared an object of blame by the ‘WE are all one’ -people, since I should not be an individual. Could be message from my others ‘out there’, the ‘we and our collegue’ – people so to speak. My so called others, since I’m not supposed to say ‘we’ myself. We and our particular interests are the priority seems to be the message. I should surrender indeed? And I have to admit: it’s hopeless to a degree that I didn’t expect. I’m naive.
I’m simply declared not ok in a vague way, doesn’t even have to make sense. Content is ignored totally as it seems to be. Projections are going on all over the place anyways. People told me: ‘you look like my father’ several times. (I’m innocent, I’m not their father, not even male, my blue eyes should be proof of my innocence, I’m supposed to be at the safe side that way?) You know, fake power might be what’s in charge in actuality? While in the spiritual school Hameed’s deeply appreciated teachings are about the potentialities of applying Essential qualities. Wonderful! YES! Yes, let’s get human now. Love now. YES!
And by the way TIME might be involved. Instead of just here now. I mean, I had to deal with the issue of Being manipulated away by a Diamond Approach Teacher. Ego was involved. I was confronted with an inability to be objective all over the place as it appeared to me. (I tried my best in that sense of objectivity.) So my existence was just wiped. No access to the school anymore. I was not responded to in a real way. I was supposed to be a nobody, or what? Nobody does stand up for me? I should surrender. Yeah. No access to my precious beloved teacher Hameed anymore, ‘in my case’. I should disappear in the void and not be a bother. I was considered such a naughty child. I should learn to obey at last? No inquiry, no investigation, has taken place whatsoever according to all kinds of bullshit that has been going on as far as I know. No response by ethical committee nor responded to by the ‘care committee’. Just surrender? Just carry my fate? I’m declared an object of blame by the authorities of this precious school? I should tolerate and accept whatever? I don’t agree.
The perspective of the DA teachers might be that a very important seniour teacher. our collegue, told us that you should leave, for whatever reasons, so she must be right? And indifference otherwise? How it appears to be for me. Many tears have been shed. A traumatic past of the senior teacher was involved in my eyes. Sometimes that kind of stuff is acted out inevitably. Has been sheer ignorance and denial. Has been too impossible. So that past has been acted out at my cost and at the cost of fellow students as well. My Understanding, my Forgiveness. (yes somebody here to say in my case: I forgive, a lot of understanding meanwhile).
Psychological stuff is usually involved, also in a Spiritual school. Projections, superego claims, I should, you should and so on. I studied the whole context. I also tried to stand up for myself. Which has been in vain. Despite my Strength. I was not listened to. Maybe because of my Strength and Steadfastness? The doors stay closed! I should obey, I should surrender, I should not be listened to. The President of the school himself told me that he would send his lawyers. I said: yes, ok, let’s go to court, see what happens. Prevented by Hameed probably.
My reasonable request was: listen to me please. I need to be rehabilitated. Can we please apply those beautiful Essential qualities that Hameed has been talking about all along? Like Surrender (needed sometimes, not always, not hands up in every situation right. Like: the superiority of white people or male people is a given. Can you please accept your status as Being less then whatever whiteskinny person that’s supposed to know better in advance. Despite your objective intelligence, university grades, life experience and so on and so forth. While in a dangerous situation, where no dialogue is possible, better learn to give in for a little while. Hands up yes. To save our very lives. But.. just surrender?! Really? Let’s hide? Let’s give in to abuse? Are you kidding?)
How about applying the Love and the Steadfast Will or Awareness and Presence. has been my reasonable request to the folks of the Ridhwan school. I asked for applying this precious tool of inquiry. I asked for Being rehabilitated, since an authoritarian approach does not seem to be aligned with Hameed’s lifelong work as I made explicit. Why would a superego approach be seen as a ‘stronger approach’ then the Diamond Approach? I have been wondering. Why the silence treatment? I have been mainly confronted with silence. Being excluded. Should we surrender to narcissism and all kinds of blame? Being seen as not important whatsoever? Just surrender to the ego of our so called others, since I myself have been declared ‘other’? I should surrender and be just loving. Yeah.
Yes, I surrrended within. Yes, trying to beat ego of my fellow beings is an impossible job. Ok, I’ll give in. I’ll give up. I’m gone in a way. Killed in a way. I’m still alive as well. And I’ll continue to show up and ask for some reasonability. How else. So I don’t agree with Hameed’s message here now: just surrender always is the most advanced or best in any case, even if it would be at the cost of my own wish to become friends again, my whish to clear the space, to face the issue, to talk a bit, to be reasonable and to apply the beautiful Essential qualities like Love and Surrender. Hameed himself is ignored all this time is how I feel about what is going on? Hameed’s teachings just considered something to throw away? I – do – not – agree!!!! His Work is so precious to me. My deep respect!!
My tough love I guess? My love for myself is implied. Wouldn’t be reasonable if Hameed himself (I’m joking, he’s God in my eyes, I like the colour of his shirt, meaningful in my eyes,) would ask me to not exist. But if he himself would ask me to give in to the authorities if they claim to know better, if He Himself would tell me that I should indeed surrender to being declared of no importance whatsoever, since my life doesn’t count indeed? I would be forced to disappear in the void I guess? Would be easiest for whom?
You know, I have always surrendered to my others who pretended to know better, I shrugged my shoulders most of the time and I continued to learn from them even, my others wanting to be most important and so on. Can lead to abuse to just surrender as I know by experience. Can lead to abuse to just surrender externally I mean, I do surrender within meanwhile. This hopeless? I didn’t know that! I’m terrified at a deep plane, I have to admit. Really? Either ego or Being Real? Can’t be true. In Hameed’s school?! So now I know. And yes here and now. And we also have to face what needs to be faced sometimes?
As an embodied human being, as an individual in my own right, having learned so much from dear Hameed my precious teacher during those 5 years when I was ‘allowed’ to be a student in the school, and also the during the 10 years (!) that I kept showing up with my own particular truth, how I wanted to be part in the school, my proposals to face the situation: my conclusion is that saying ‘no’ sometimes to my others, to the authorities even, is needed sometimes. It’s a YES to myself in actuality.
So I don’t agree with Hameed if he would say: Surrender is best. I don’t even understand the distinction between inner and outer I have to admit. But now I know, as reasonable as possible, I continue to say yes to myself, which does imply a ‘no’ to my others out there sometimes. I don’t wanna tell them they’re just narcissistic, just bad, just their ego, those others, my authorities. It’s not that now ‘they’ have become the ‘object of blame’ for me. In reality people are sometimes ‘good’ sometimes ‘bad’ if you like, dependent on the perspective, but I do not surrender to Being declared an object of blame by authorities that are telling me: our WE, not you, stranger! So I do not always surrender in every situation is my point.
Has been meaningful to learn this little piece of wisdom. I learned a lot while I kept standing up for myself. Has been very very difficult for sure. But surrender to what isn’t most Real would have simply killed me! I did learn to give up to the world of ego totally, I learned to detach totally in a sense. Meanwhile I do not assume that my fellow Beings are just their defense, or that defense needs to be seen as identity. I assume it’s all just an attempt to avoid painful experiences. And that attempt needs to be at my cost or at the cost of whoever as an ‘object of blame’. Needs to be faced in my view. But I cannot change my others of course. And if going along with whatever and surrender always is what Hameed prefers, I do not agree.
So thanks Hameed, for everything, but if you would tell me: go play outside, it’s about me and my school, you do not count..If you would tell me that my soul being doesn’t count, not of much value indeed, if you would tell me that you don’t give a fuck about my deep engagement with your life work for such a long time. If you would tell me: it’s just about them, it is how it is, ego runs the show, that’s my reality, and all others are my WE, while you do not belong apparently and it does not have to become clear indeed why you need to be abandonded by US, since all kinds of interests are involved indeed. Which should stay hidden indeed. People do not want to talk. They prefer silence. So did you become Buddhist now, Hameed, I would ask. Just the silence? On our way to Light.
Well in that case, I would be forced to leave you, dear Hameed. Since I do not buy Being treated in such a way by you and your collegues if I’m simply sincere myself. I don’t think that’s your intention by the way if you tell me: play outside, or give up on the world of denial and lies out there otherwise, either -or, but don’t you dare to be who you are. YES, dear Hameed, I love you. I am deeply committed to your lifework. So Yes, I do surrender internally to what’s most true. and I’m willing to deal with the situation myself at the best of my capacity. Which is what I have done till now.
I do need support though, I do need to be rehabilitated, and if that’s not what you choose to do yourself, rehabilitating me in my dire situation, if you just tell me to please surrender to the situation of power abuse and spiritual abuse, I would give up. I don’t believe you though. I think you are reasonable and loving and supportive. Not easy for you either to deal with it all! With love and understanding, here and now. Isabelle
Putin bashing invalidates this conversation. Surely a surrendered ego would be aware of the pitfalls of misinformation, disinformation, etc, and avoid political judgements that are premature or or potentially misguided.
He is able to talk about such profound stuff in a totally unpretentious and relaxed way. Bravo, thank you !
Thank you for the kind words, Karen! We are happy you are here and are able to feel the amazing energy and love through the wisdom of our speakers in the Surrender Summit. Love.Now
That was very profound and so inspiring. Thank you Kute and Hameed for sharing this holy moment, God Bless you.
With peace and respect
Wafa
Thank you, Wafa, and thank YOURSELF for receiving the gift and wisdom of surrender. Keep watching for more practical how-to’s for living surrender. Love.Now
The BE-ing I get. It’s the No-Thing that is still beyond! 😀
Supremely grateful that A.H. Almaas was able to share his wisdom in this Surrender Summit. That heartfull moment towards the end touched me deeply, when surrender was perceived as “an openness to experiencing reality beyond my current understanding”…just beautiful. Thank you.
Thank you for your thoughtful words, Eli! We are happy you are here to receive the wisdom of such visionaries like A.H. Almaas. Stay tuned for more this week! Love.Now
Holy WOW- I can get aspects of what he is saying, like wisps I can sort of see but not quite hold! But this is BEYOND!
Yes, Tui! Surrendering to your own divinity is a process and once you put into practice all the wisdom that is being shared this week, you will surely be able to grasp the true meaning of being. Love.Now
When facing something that I cannot do, my ego says I can, but deep inside I have knowledge that I am weak. So I let it go and surrender and feel the mighty power of the divine to take over lead me to do what needs to be done.
Yes, Lani! Surrender to your inner divinity! Love.Now